Hey Big Sexy,
Thanks for your note and thoughts.
I went through my own issues of depression and had a very rough time during my teen years and early 20s but finally pulled myself together and managed to graduate in 1990. I remember that my dad got his first computer in those days and it seems that Chris spent all his time working/playing on it ? I have almost no memories of him during his teen years. By the time he left for college, I hardly new him at all. And I?ve had only a handful of interactions with him since then ? the time I drove him back to school after he had broken his arm in a skateboarding accident and come home for a few days, and the time that I bailed him out paying all his bills and setting him up in a new apartment. I recognized that Chris was depressed but I had no regular contact with him (he wouldn?t allow it) so I never new if he was doing well or really poorly. It seems that he spent a lot of time doing poorly and hiding it from everyone else. This experience has been really hard for my whole family but probably not as bad as it would have been if we were in more regular contact with Chris.
T
<font color="#CC6600"><font size="1">[ October 20, 2008 09:45 AM: Message edited by: The Big Sexy ]</font></font>
<font color="#CC6600" size="1">[ October 20, 2008 11:16 AM: Message edited by: The Big Sexy ]</font>
Sorry about your loss. That is sad. I don't understand why some people think a person's sexuality makes any damn difference what kind of person he/she is. It just shouldn't matter. Straight, Bi, Gay, who cares...
<font color="#CC6600" size="1">[ October 20, 2008 10:52 AM: Message edited by: Beachcomber ]</font>
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I actually didn't know Chris other than that he was the little brother of a grade school friend of mine. The last I saw him, he was this cute little kid who drew with crayon all over the walls of his bedroom.Originally posted by Beachcomber:
Sorry about your loss. That is sad. I don't understand why some people think a person's sexuality makes any damn difference what kind of person he/she is. It just shouldn't matter. Straight, Bi, Gay, who cares...
<font color="#CC6600"><font size="1">[ October 20, 2008 10:52 AM: Message edited by: Beachcomber ]</font></font>
Chris's family was a big part of my childhood, and even though we don't talk much, there's still a strong connection to my past.
The news of Chris's suicide opened up discussion of depression between my family and his. As a result, I came to find out that one of my family members has had a rather significant struggle with depression. The signs were there, I just didn't recognize them.
I have struggled with depression since I was about 4 yrs old. My maternal grandmother was institutionalized for it and died when I was 5, buried on Christmas Eve. (So I had just turned 5 earlier that month, 1969) I can still remember how cold it was and the snow blowing around when we went to Spring Grove Cemetery for the burial. My depression seems to have started at that time. I have always channeled it into creative energy. The more depressed I get the more creative I get. It's a monstrous price to pay for creativity, but commonly found in a lot of artists through out history. I have never sought treatment for it, I just see it as part of who I am and as a creative engine.
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Before you made this post, I'd been trying to find an excellent article about the connection between depression and creativity. Unfortunately, the person who sent it to me doesn't remember the article at all.Originally posted by Beachcomber:
I have struggled with depression since I was about 4 yrs old. My maternal grandmother was institutionalized for it and died when I was 5, buried on Christmas Eve. (So I had just turned 5 earlier that month, 1969) I can still remember how cold it was and the snow blowing around when we went to Spring Grove Cemetery for the burial. My depression seems to have started at that time. I have always channeled it into creative energy. The more depressed I get the more creative I get. It's a monstrous price to pay for creativity, but commonly found in a lot of artists through out history. I have never sought treatment for it, I just see it as part of who I am and as a creative engine.
I tend to lean to the "down" side. I'm not exactly an upbeat person. While I've never wanted to kill myself, I understand why people end their lives.
The ways I chase away the blues is by exercising 3 or 4 times a week - that's the best pick-me-up ever. Jogging or just going to the gym for a moderate to heavy workout really does the trick.
Other than that, I keep myself way too busy so I distract myself from the futility of it all. Between work, school, a fixer-upper, routine workouts, attempts at a social life, and assorted other distractions like playing in a tennis league, taking golf lessons, or planning a trip here or there, and arguing with people online, there's no time to be depressed. I have a laundry list of things I need to do/want to do.
My neighbor has nicknamed me "Worker Bee," but I think that's primarily because I'd set ambitious goals to get outdoor projects done this year and when I'm outside, I'm obviously on a mission and get irritated when I'm interrupted.
<font color="#CC6600"><font size="1">[ October 20, 2008 05:26 PM: Message edited by: The Big Sexy ]</font></font>
<font color="#CC6600" size="1">[ October 21, 2008 10:28 AM: Message edited by: The Big Sexy ]</font>
Keeping busy is good for mind and spirit. [img]graemlins/thumbs_up.gif[/img]
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